The Only She I Will Always Love
I entered this world on one midnight in the humid monsoon air of January
Under the capricorn stars and the lunar light of a waxing crescent moon
It’s odd and wonderful to know that amongst the frail silence and beauty,
a woman risked her life
to give me a chance to live
which I’m not even sure I deserve to this day
I never asked for it, yet I’m glad it transpired
that someone in this world
was willing to be cut open while her eyes are closed
for me
to blink and to breathe
to cry and to laugh
to crawl, to walk, to ride
to bump my big head
to persevere and to fight
to speak, to write, to walk
to be a child and to age
to grief
to appreciate life
She raised me with discipline,
dignity,
compassion,
and most importantly, love.
The love I know is one that knows no limit, distance, or expiration date
It has no terms and conditions,
or side effects
or caveats.
For once, surrendering to a blinded love is good.
Pure and eternal.
This love is not enough to be captured and turned into a grid once a year
Or expressed through roses
or spoken out loud in public
This love I experience is meant to be lived
through hardships, doubts, and sacrifices
27 years and counting
until she enters the garden of Eden one day
Through toils and snares I’ve gone through
yet she’s always there
Putting her life last, and mine first
Just like that night in January
She’s always there to make me soar
no matter what shit I went through
or however blue or black my heart subdue.
She would break down and question life,
pacing through strife,
yet every time she would thrive.
We don’t say I love you enough
Yet I feel her unconditional love
like a velvet glove
protecting me from the evil cuts of the universe.
I use her fragile
yet unbreakable sensitivity
as a protective barrier every day I go to the battlefield.
And I embrace her sacrifice
to pick myself back up
every time I break
due to an imperfect splice.
I know it’s not for forever
Because forever would make me take things for granted
The ticking bomb without a time stamp is a blessing in disguise
and there is no way I could cut any of its wires to stop time
So let me carry it wherever I go
As a reminder that you are still here today
And I should never wait until tomorrow
